In the dream I hear there’s an urgent recall on all scarab bracelets purchased 15 years ago and rush to my jewelry box to find mine, not worn in many years, with one of its plastic scarabs cracked in the center. I see a tiny winged insect climb out. It is too flat and its tail bends up like a coat hook. When it starts flying around the room, I have the mind to take a picture and fumble with my phone just like in real life. I can see on screen how fantastical the bug looks, how shaggy its coat and cartoonishly big its eyes are (oh how I would love access to the camera roll from my dreams). I’m afraid to let it outside because it’s too cold. Later, the rest of the scarabs on my bracelet hatch regular bugs, all mismatched, plain and thus horrible. My husband flings the bracelet out the door.
Dreams about scarab beetles can signify metamorphosis. Jung once had an overly controlled, rational patient who shared a dream she’d had the night before about a golden scarab and then they both heard a tapping sound at the window. It was a real golden scarab beetle and Jung opened the window and said to his patient “Here is your scarab.” The patient had a spiritual breakthrough and Jung had one too. He spent much of his practice marveling at synchronicity, or meaningful coincidence, and applied it to his therapeutic techniques.
Once I decided I was going to write about the scarab dream, I went to my jewelry box to see if I still had the bracelet and was surprised to find it was a watch. The subconscious can forget things too. I remember now it was a birthday or Christmas gift from my husband. The vague watch face tells me the battery died at either 9:20 or 10:20, offering a clue as to why I may have stopped wearing it. The undersides of the scarabs are curved and hollow, unscathed. They have not nor will they ever hatch bugs, exotic or plain.
At lunch yesterday, I checked email in my car and found one about an unexpected refund. When I went to turn on my car, it only made a clicking sound and I spent almost the same amount of money on an auto club membership and new battery, both things I needed but had been putting off. I missed a couple hours of work and will use leave I’ve known will not roll over if I don’t use it by the end of the year. When I texted my husband about the unexpected refund and costs he wrote back “easy come, easy go.” I wrote back “karma”.
Last week I bought tickets online for a Roger Waters concert and paid what I knew had to be a mistake. It turns out the price was missing a whole digit, so it’s safe to say someone lost their job over that one. Once the ticketing company noticed the error, they charged the difference to our credit cards and now, a week later, sent an email around saying “you know, that wasn’t really fair, was it?” They refunded the difference. They even threw in free parking to really make us feel horrible or happy, depending on how guilty our conscience.
Easy come, easy go, Karma.
I’m excited to go to this concert with my husband, even though it’s not until next summer. We’ve only recently started making time to see shows or concerts together and Pink Floyd is my desert island band. I never got to see them when they toured in the late 80s without Roger Waters. If you wait long enough, it all fits together like a puzzle, but you have to keep track of the pieces, taking time to put them away in the right box so it’s all there when you need it.